Yes, I said it so now I have to own it. Today is the first day, the very first day that I am 110% honest and truthful with myself as well as with all of you reading. I am not going to lie, or sugar coat anything. I am 60 pounds overweight. It’s time for me to stop hiding behind kids, pillows, blankets, or big over-sized clothes and work towards standing in the forefront of the photos. How did I let myself go? What caused me to gain this weight and not get it off? What am I going to do to get it off now? Am I ready to get my ass in gear? I will start my journey with a little bit of back history.
My whole entire life I had always been the one to down a cheeseburger, huge orders of french fries, milk shakes, cookies, and anything else that I saw in my path. When I got married, my 5’3″ frame weighed 118 pounds. I had a 36C chest and had a figure that I can only dream about having. Granted, I was 26 years old, but still. I was never one to go all out and exercise. I actually hated to exercise, and apparently I still do. Fast forward to my child bearing days. My first child resulted in a 50 pounds weight gain. After one year and settling into my new role as mom, I decided it was time to drop the weight. And, I did. I worked out like crazy. I did aerobics, step classes and regularly used the weight machines. Then as soon as I got down to a comfortable weight for me (130 pounds), I ended up getting pregnant with my second child. Again, I gained 50 pounds. Again, after a year, I decided it was time to lose that weight too. It was harder to lose it, but I had two small children and I had to make adjustments for them. After another year, I lost 45 pounds and ended up weighing 145 pounds when I got pregnant with my third and last child. Now I am 145 and I am pregnant again! I tried harder to not gain as much and I gained 45 pounds. When I gave birth I was 190 pounds. I got down to about 170 shortly there after, but then had a bit of bad news financially. This was back in 2009 and I ended up gaining 20 pounds back, bringing me back up to 190 pounds. So here I sit, it’s now 2015 and I weight a whopping 195 pounds. Here I sit thinking, it’s time. I am starting to feel like I felt after the birth of my first child. I just knew it was time to get my ass in gear and I did it. Today I sit here knowing, if I don’t get my ass in gear, I may not be here to enjoy my children or my life in general. I sit here knowing, it’s time.
So, what do I have to do? Well, I have to get back to exercising in some way, shape or form. I know that when I lost weight before, I never changed my eating habits. I just focused on my physical fitness and the weight just dropped off. This is what I have to do. Don’t get me wrong, yes, eating foods that are bad for you is never good and it goes hand in hand, but I think for me, so I don’t overwhelm myself, I need to put all my focus into one thing and one thing only right now. I choose to focus on my exercise. Yes, I plan on eating better but my main concentration will be on my exercising and my measurements.
With this blog I plan on sharing every aspect of my weight loss, physical fitness journey. I want it to be a place that I can share all of my ups and downs. I want to be able to share awesome recipes, fitness goals and motivating quotes. I want to be able to feel support and peace of mind knowing I am doing what I have to do to become a healthy human. I have a double graduation to plan for and I don’t want to be hiding in the background feeling ashamed and huge. I want to stand right smack dab next to my kids on their important days without the fake feelings of happiness. It is my hope that you, my readers will be supportive and helpful. And I know there will be haters out there, or do-gooders who think they know what’s up, but honestly, I don’t need to hear bashing or anything negative throughout this journey as I feel worse about myself than you could ever make me feel with your words. Those types of comments will be deleted, never to be seen.
This all said, what has motivated you to stick to your journey? Do you have any tips or advice for me as I begin this long weight loss battle? I’d love to hear from you…as long as it’s positive! 🙂